TENTH DIARY – Written Words on Passing Pages

Yesterday I ordered a weighing machine and the delivery guy woke me up at 8 AM to deliver it today. Amazon doing a great job, even though in fact I had canceled the order for high price reasons. Once you have a weighing machine, the paranoia of weight increases. Of course, I had to weigh myself, and I did. Before that I needed to know the thing is accurate – a half-liter milk pouch and a 1kg detergent packet served the purpose. Voila! I weighed myself. 87.55kgs, that’s it. Even by the strictest standards I had set for myself, I’m doing a great job. I’ve made an Excel sheet with weight projections – well, projections is what I do for a living and projections is what I’m doing for living, kind of, remember the obese classification thing? In the strict case, that is 800 calories limit every day without cheat, I should have weighed 87.72kgs. 2.45kg lost in 11 days made me a bit worried, is it healthy? Mark you, I had taken at least 3 glasses of water before weighing, so, it’s not the low...

Wait, Stop, Control the Hunger! So many times I’m required to tell this to myself. Especially when I’m not working or it’s a weekend. Somehow I reach the fridge, and I remember, and tell this to myself and get back. Since morning today, I’m only on papaya, however, it was a lot of it, more than half a kg. I also had a cup of milk tea without sugar. That makes a total of 250-300 cals till 2:30 pm. In the evening I’ll have light snacks and for dinner, I’ll have chicken with some rice. Overall it’s going to be around 800 cals for today. But it hasn’t been so every day till now. The number of cheats has been higher than I had expected, that’s beyond 10%. On the fourth night I had a heavy dinner in a restaurant and 7 th day, that’s yesterday was a pure play cheat – with a total of almost 2500 cals. After the dinner at the restaurant I had the guilt and wanted to make up, so I starved on the 5 th day – 500 cals, that’s it. But it caused gas, and I got a weakness. I realized it wasn’t hea...

Day 3: 21.03.2023 This is the third day of my weight loss journey. I started it on 19.03.2023. The day was not much special but I just got to remember that I need to lose weight and I can do it. I weigh approximately 90kg and given my height of 175 cm, it means a BMI of ~30. A BMI of over 30 is classified as obese and this is not acceptable to me. I have weighed myself several times in the past few months and every time it has been just short of 90, the psychological mark, and a few days back it was almost 90. I don’t look fat, but I’ve started hating my belly, especially when my shirt is forming wrinkles around. I joined the gym several times in the last year but couldn’t maintain discipline. No doubt, I keep myself sufficiently active but probably that’s not enough given my love for food. But, now I’m ready for a compromise for the sake of avoiding obese classification and the fat belly going back. And so, I’ve decided, (decided again) to give up my love for food for the next fou...